VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize