you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
