Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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