you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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