she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
