If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
