thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
