Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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