Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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