her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
only you would photoshop your dick
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
