Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
