Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
