Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
