is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
