Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
