I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
