the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
