I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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