I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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