I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
