I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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