Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
