dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
