bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
True strength comes from lack of pants
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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