K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize