so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
