I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Randomize
