You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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