never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
