Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Randomize
