hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
