The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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