he thought i was a dude.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
