The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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