One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
