Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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