and i looked up. we had an audience...
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
