So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Randomize
