so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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