we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize