i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
