he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
