everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
my being single is dangerous.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
