He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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