just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize