Your face is a jimmy john
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize