at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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