You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
