The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
