Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
