and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
